We sold our house, we closed on Wednesday. It was bitter sweet. I cried some, but overall am sure that it was the right move. I tell myself over and over that it's just the house we left behind, the home comes with us where ever we go. I'll work to hold on to the good memories. So much of our life was lived there. We bought young, really young . Looking over the pictures of the house before we moved in we wondered what we saw, and what in the world made us think that WE could do everything that was done to make it our home. But we did. Life was even made there, twice! Born there once. We also experienced loss there, there are still days when I think Binger should be right around the corner or underfoot. Good times and bad times, joy and anger, and lots of love filled that little house. When we started packing I thought I'd take pictures of the house empty. But when I saw it, I knew I couldn't handle seeing documentation of that house, our house, void of nearly everything that is us. So there are no pictures, only memories that I hope will be forgotten. All our loss was softened by knowing we sold the house to a really nice guy, someone who loves it and doesn't plan to change a thing. He's even going to try his had at gardening in our veggie beds.
Apartment, in a complex no less, living isn't where we'd (I'd- Piper finds it to be a great adventure) prefer to be. But at least we have a roof over our heads. Things are different here, we now have a pantry that is bigger than any closet we had in our house, a dishwasher that isn't me, and a garage. We'll continue to try to make it feel more like home and less like a rental. I'm holding out hope that pictures on the walls and some curtains will the trick. Without putting holes in the wall, of course.
On this eve of the new year, we say goodbye to all that 2010 has brought our family. Look forward to what 2011 will bring...hopefully in the form of our perfect house.
Wishing you all health and happiness in the year to come.
4 comments:
Bittersweet. I often look back at what we gave up, and still feel like a little bit of me is still back there. We planned that house as my Dad built it. The children and cousins grew up there as much as I did. It was a very beautiful home in my eyes. Where we live now is not a beautiful house, but it feels like home, for now. Life goes on. I pray for your little family to find just the right house to make your home. God will open up the door. Your house isn't ready yet. Love, Mom
Glad to hear the move went well. I completely understand the feeling of leaving. We have done and will continue to do it too much. I have no doubts the right house will find itself in your path and your "new home" will come to life.
Irm,
I can't imagine having to leave a house your father built for you. It was hard enough leaving one we never intended to stay in, and was far to small for our growing family. We certain at some point our new home will fall into our laps. Probably, with a lot of hard work.
~emmy.
Stormy,
I've actually thought of you many times through out this process. As I search the thrift store for curtains instead of my go to buying of fabric and sewing my own. You always manage you make your rental apartments feel so homey. I strive to do the same with our apartment.
~emmy.
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